Good grief, where has Summer gone? Having ‘kids’ of my own who are long past the traditional cadence of secondary school, I confess I’ve lost touch with the predictability of the giddy glee of late May/early June “school’s out for Summer” (tip of the cap to Alice Cooper!) celebrations and the gloom of late August/early September realizations that the new school year beckons. (I can vaguely recall my now-21-year-old, as a much younger lad, being legitimately excited about going back to school. I think I recall that excitement giving way to the surly snap of one-word grunts when it came time for getting ready for the resumption of school at about the time of his transition to middle school.)

Nonetheless, here we are. Late August. For students in MCPS, it’s 26 August. Fairfax County students started on 19 August! It won’t be long until our highways and byways are clogged with yellow school buses and the often questionable driving of young high schoolers. It’s a reminder to mind your speed and keep your eyes open for lots and lots of kids walking to, from, and around neighborhood schools across the DMV.

It’s also a time for us to give thought to how we, as a community, can support kids with disabilities as they return to school. For many kids with disabilities and their families, not only are there the typical stressors of returning to school, but there are additional things—lots of things—about which to worry and be anxious.

By the way, the pall of that sentence isn’t lost on me. And, while it’s not my intent to be a bummer, the realities of these sorts of transitions are, well, real. For me and Sheila, I suppose our biggest stressors were whether or not the boys had the right backpacks and composition notebooks, whether there were enough mechanical pencils, the right calculator, and the right color highlighters. And, we’d practice walking from the house to school or to the bus stop. But honestly, that was about the sum of it.

For kids with disabilities, it’s those things and so much more. All doable (parents of kids with disabilities are expert at this sort of thing, an expertise developed and reinforced over years and years of repetition), but all requiring a heckuva lot of attention and all inevitably coupled with the anxiety of the unknown.

As you may know, Makom is a Hebrew word that means ‘place.’ Our use of place is existential: EVERYONE has their rightful place in our communities, our neighborhoods, and yes, our schools. And, if anyone is precluded from their place, then our communities, our neighborhoods, and yes, our schools are poorer for their absence. This is a theme at Makom of profound centrality.

In that spirit, then, we offer the following thoughts, resources, and suggestions. Feel free to forward these along to other parents, other students, teachers, administrators, and anyone else with an interest in our community’s children.

1. The Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA) is the law of the land. It extends a raft of legal, civil rights to students with disabilities, not least to a free and appropriate public education. Students and parents have rights, and informed families who partner with schools and special education teachers and administrators will nearly always deliver both a great school experience for their children and a great set of outcomes for those children.
2. Parents of kids without disabilities should continue to encourage their students to engage and connect with their peers with disabilities. Talk openly about stuff like the “R-word” and why it has to end! Talk about the opportunities to normalize friendships that aren’t defined by the presence or absence of disability. As a dad of 25 years, I’ve learned that what we normalize at home becomes a bit more anesthetized from classic school-based peer pressures. Be intentional and explicit in talking to your kids about this.
3. For parents of kids with disabilities, here’s The Ultimate Back-To-School Guide for Families of Children With Disabilities from The Arc of the United States. It’s short. It’s sweet. It’s good. More HERE, HERE and HERE (if you live in Virginia).

We recognize and celebrate that it does indeed take a village to raise our kids. Yes, it’s parents. But, it’s also teachers, coaches, Rabbis/Ministers/Pastors, trusted neighbors, family, and friends. Sheila and I are quite comfortable in acknowledging that our boys—now men—are the product of our parenting, yes, but also our village. And, while our kids are within touching distance of being fully launched, our obligation to other kids remains. This is the essence of community and resides at the heart of the work and commitment of Makom.

So yes, it’s back-to-school time, a time of excitement and worry. For our kids with disabilities and their families, all of us at Makom and the whole of the Makom community stand with you. We recognize that yep, it takes a village. Makom enthusiastically embraces the privilege and responsibility of being a part of that village. We stand with our kids, we stand with our families, we stand with our schools. We wish all of our kids, families, and teachers a great school year—make us proud!

– David